"I'll Drink To That!

...and one for Mahler." -Ladies Who Lunch

I wouldn't say that I'm a mixologist but I will say that I can be quite creative when it comes to mixing adult beverages. Guess it goes back to my childhood when I learned how to mix a drink for the adults. Sort of like Patrick in Auntie Mame.

So this is what I have come up with but I have yet to give it a name.

(Smirnoff Orange serves as a good substitute.)

So anywho. Get creative and help me come up with a name for my new drink.

Isaac Hayes dies

On Thursday evening, I heard a remix of Isaac Hayes's Theme from Shaft and I thought, "I need to see if that is available on iTunes.

Click 2 Houston: Your Education Station is reporting that Isaac Hayes has died.



I always like Theme from Shaft because of the orchestration. This was LONG before synthesizers were common place. I was in high school and we would play this song at some of the football games.

From the story about his death:
In the early 1970s, Hayes laid the groundwork for disco, for what became known as urban-contemporary music and for romantic crooners like Barry White. And he was rapping before there was rap.

To this day, my favorite line from Theme from Shaft is:
"They say this cat Shaft is a bad mother... Shut yo mouth! But I'm talking about Shaft."

Rest in peace Isaac and thank you for your influence on music.

I Lost My Faith. You Gave Me Hemoroids. Now I Can't Eat Tortillas.

I have TRIED not to comment on a trial that is being held here in Houston. It all goes back to an incident that occurred three years ago on a Continental flight.

Here is my summation:

• Joel Osteen and his wife Vicki board a Continental flight to Vail, Colorado, U.S.A.
• Vicki sees some liquid on her First Class seat arm rest and asks flight attendant Sharon Brown to clean it up.
• An argument ensues for whatever reason.
• Sharon says Vicki pushed her on her way to the cockpit to ask the captain to intervene.
• Vicki, Joel and family leave the plane.
• Houston Chronicle and other media sources report breaking news.
• Time passes and no criminal charges are filed.
• Vicki pays some sort of FAA fine because she tried to get to the cockpit.
• Sharon loses her faith in her church and gets hemorrhoids and blames it on Vicki.
• Life goes on for Vicki and Joel.
• Sharon decides that she wants 10% of Vicki's net worth because she lost her faith and got hemorroids.
• Trial started this past week in Houston, Texas home of crazy women: Anna Nicole Smith; Clara Harris (ran over her cheating husband with a Mercedes); Lisa Nowak (astronaut who drove to Orlando in a wig and a diaper to knock-off her boyfriend's other love interest); Wanda Holloway (the cheerleader's mom who was going to knock-off the mother of another cheerleader); Barbara Bush (who said that the people of New Orleans were better off living in the Astrodome after Hurricane Katrina); and just for fun, home of the Super Bowl that flashed Janet Jackson's titty and the world came to a stand still in prime time because we just don't do that on the telly. We got the crazy women I tell ya! EDIT: I remembered one other crazy woman here in Houston, Andrea Yates. She drowned her five children.
• Vicki says that just like Str8 Up With A Twist, I use my hands when I talk and I touch people. I was just being me.

OK. If you're going to lose your faith after getting shoved by a preacher's wife...honey, that faith was on thin ice to begin with!

Let me say something. I'm Roman Catholic and proud of it. This is the religion that instigated the Spanish Inquisition. We produced the Crusades. We sent the missionaries to America to indoctrinate the Native Americans to our religion. We didn't intervene during the Holocaust. We have endured priest molestation charges.

I went to twelve years of Catholic school where the nuns, brothers and priests were the final word and there was no arguing. If they said it, then so be it. So if anyone should lose faith and have hemorrhoids, it is me.

And believe it or not, I ain't filing a lawsuit against anybody and I still try to attend Sunday Mass every Sunday. Do you see ME filing suit because I get acid indigestion? No! I have a cocktail and get over it.

There needs to be some type of control over who can sue and who can't sue. The fact that criminal charges were never filed and this has ended up in a civil court says quite a bit. Somebody wants some money. Just sayin'.

So what does this have to do with tortillas?

Well...Friday night at Olympus Goes Olympic, someone was talking about Kaye Sedilla. I heard him say that Kaye Sedilla molested him on the patio of Rich's two years ago during Miss Mint Julep. He said that when it was over his face was smeared with Kaye Sedilla's lipstick and his shirt had been stripped off of him. (Kaye Sedilla does love a man with a hairy chest.)

I heard this person say that after that incident he can no longer eat tortillas.

Kaye, if you're reading this...you might slapped with a lawsuit in civil court because someone can no longer eat tortillas thanks to you. Might be time for you to start asking Joel Osteen to pray for you! And while you're at it, hire Rusty Hardin. Just sayin'.

Olympus Goes Olympic (recap)

Here are some photos for you to peruse. Enjoy!

Representing the Croquet Team with uniform from Fallas Paredes:
Representing the Baseball Team:
A masked guest:
A visitor from China:
Slinging drinks, your happy bartenders:
Representing the country of England:

Spectators:
Representing the running team:
Baseball team member socializing with other participants (whose pitching and whose catching? Just askin'):
Representing the Wine Drinking Team, Soccer, the press, and Italy's cocktail drinking team:

Giving Ralph Lauren his laurels:

Playing the role of Nina Garcia, Cynorsure offered his comments on the uniforms of the participating contingents:

Happy spectators and participants:

Someone concerned about the Beijing air quality (or was it the smoke coming from the grill and wok in the kitchen?):

The Drinking Team socializing with a Soccer Team member:

Baseball Team and Drinking Team member from The Republic of Cocktail Land:

About Last Night 1.1

Last night was the Opening Ceremony for the 2008 Summer Olympic Games in Beijing, China. As mentioned in a previous post, Krewe of Olympus-Texas had a party.

I was working the bar and working the crowd most of the evening so I didn't see much of the ceremony. I'll watch it later.

And later, I will post pictures from the party.

A funny thing happened on the way to the forum. So. It's toward the end of the party and I'm talking to a couple of guests and all of sudden someone comes up behind me and hits me, yes...hits me on the back of the head.

I turned around only to discover it is someone I don't know. So I'm thinking, "WTF?"

So the guy says, "You had a bug on your head and I wanted to get it off of you before it went anywhere else."

OK. I don't see a bug anywhere.

Then he hits my left shoulder while I'm still trying to digest all of this and thank goodness I had consumed a few cocktails because now I'm laughing.

So then he says, "Look!" as he points to the floor and sure enough there was some sort of a bug.

I'm still laughing about it because I can only imagine what my face may have looked like when I got hit on the back of my head.

So here it is around 8:40 a.m. CDT or so and I haven't had my fix for the day. The Calvinator and I slept in and didn't get up until 7:30 a.m. CDT or so.

Last night's party was over around 10:00 p.m. CDT or so and let's just say, I didn't home until 1:00 a.m. CDT or so. ;-)

P.S. Don't forget to check back later today or tomorrow for the pics!

Olympus Goes Olympic

In case you've been living under a rock or have been in rehab with Kaye Sedilla/Sopa Pilla, you should know by now that the 2008 Summer Olympics officially open on Friday, August 8 in Beijing, China. (BTW...when did Peking become Beijing and why is it still named Peking Duck and not Beijing Duck? Just askin'.)

Not to miss a reason to have a party, Krewe of Olympus-Texas will be celebrating the opening ceremonies on Friday night.

A $30 donation to the Krewe will get you in the door, get you some nibbly things and open bar! Olympic attire is encouraged but not required. Str8 Up With A Twist will be there slinging drinks at the bar from 7:00p.m. - 8:00p.m. Str8 Up With A Twist can't decide how to dress for the party. A toga? Water Polo attire? Running attire? Equestrian Steeplechase attire? A Panda Bear? An Olympic Torch? The possibilities are endless.

The party is up in The Heights so stop by on your way to Cyclone Anayas, Cantina 1308, Molinas, El Tiempo, JR's, Guava Lamp or wherever you go on a Friday night. Str Up With A Twist hopes to see you there!

If you can't read the information on the graphic, click here.

BTW...I'm selling raffle tickets for the Krewe. We will be raffling a chance to win a $1000 pre-paid Visa Gift Card. Tickets are valued at $5 each.

We interrupt your Wednesday evening for a Project Runway laughfest

I can't stop giggling and laughing and The Calvinator is avoiding me. I REALLY need to either get Tivo, DVR or start taping Project Runway. There were some classic lines tonight.

The challenge was to design an outfit for the women's U.S. Olympic team. Some designs were sporty, modern and/or athletic and others were just out there.

Classic lines tonight (and not verbatim):

"You're using black?"
"We're in a depression."

"A sister has to sleep with one eye open."

"It's very Mary Had A Little Lamb."

"And she is from The Republic of Cocktail land?"

"...if her sport is drinking."

"...and you gave us a sad purple cocktail dress."

Be sure to check in with David Dust and LoneStar Steve for their recaps of Project Runway.

OK. Time for Shear Genius. It's not a Shear Genius episode unless Nekisa ends up in the bottom two!